Opening Day and Three Year Olds

[McSkagit Tim Jones]

Opening Day of Boating here in Friday Harbor. San Juan Island Yacht Club sponsored the boat parade. I invited some friends who have a three year old boy.

Well, if you read the little saying near my signature at the end of my posts, it says, Pay it Forward, Take a Kid for a Boat Ride. At the end of the Opening Day Parade, I was ready to eat those words.

This three year old had only one thing on his mind.....DRIVE THE BOAT! I set up the seat and holding on to his life vest, let him drive. It was hard over to port, then hard over to starboard, then back to port, then starboard and so on for two hours. From the boat's track, must have looked like a drunken sailor at the wheel.

If I tried to correct the heading, he'd push my hands away. If his parents took him off the seat, he'd throw a temper tantrum. I gave him a Homer Simpson Pez dispenser, which distracted him for all of two minutes. Then I gave him my crusty Wilcox fog horn. That was a mistake! Luckily, he didn't have a large lung volume!

Two hours of fighting this kid for the wheel wore me out. So I've decided to change the 'saying' near the end of my posts:

Save Your Boat and Your Sanity, Don't Take a Three Year Old Boy for a Boat Ride!:nono1:

[Helmar]

I was wondering about that saying you had....
I don't know what happened to this kids now of days, seems they are all broken, or most anyway.
Even my grand kids, I wonder.
Took my youngest and daughter to Costco and had to pack the little guy out screaming and a Lot of people looking at me like I was stealing this kid.

Must be in the plastic and genetically changed food they feed them now ??

[Skagitguy]

Gee Tim and Joe, Last Summer down in South Sound i never had a problem with my 3 year old grandson. I must say i really did not know what to expect out of him being it was his first boat ride. Grant has even asked his dad when is "Grandpa" is going to take him out again ! Maybe i was lucky....huh ? He even fell a sleep ( hum of the motor ? ) on the way back to the Marina ! What a Grandson ! Chuck

[TheBronze]

At the risk of offending the kids parents... Sounds like bad parenting. That is learned behavior that is reinforced by past success. Being a parent of 3 I've been down the tantrum road. It isn't easy to discipline at first, but the pay off in the the later years sure is worth it! Sorry it ruined your day!

[Helmar]

Not all of us are that lucky Chuck.
I know we have a Lot of good kids out there but then again, you find the ones that don't understand the word NO. Or have never been told what Respect means.

I see too many of them in stores, Costco or wherever that have what you might call an irrational sense of entitlement.
It won't kill them but will cause them to believe that they deserve rewards for doing Nothing.

Consider yourself Lucky

[bruceb]

Pretty lucky here, haven't hosted a three year old on our cruiser, Tim and all.
However, last summer in the South Sound, was cruising with Chuck, his two sons and grandson, as he noted. Just as Chuck says, he was a joy to have on the boat, if we could all be so blessed.
They followed my boat down to the launch, and the super grandson rushed up to the truck when I jumped out and he said with big excited eyes, " Is THAT your boat ?" Did it again at the end of the day when we got to the marina....
thanks for bringing your crew along, Chuck !
bruceb

[DMCI]

All over the sky!

Tim:

Frankly, I'm having up problem keeping a straight face.

I totally sympathize with your problem, but you take the kid too seriously. If that problem occurs in the future I would rig your self starboard steering station, with a gearshift maybe a throttle and a wheel, all fake. Then strapped the kid into the highchair, move him into the wheel then it's wheel to starboard, to port, fast, slow, climb, dive, whatever the kid wants. Then everybody would claim how clever he is and he would be infinitely amused.

With all due respect, what I would definitely not do is turn the wheel of that beautiful vessel over to a three-year-old!

Your previous policy is definitely sound, but(why am I chuckling), some common sense is required.

[Lootas1]

I had a hand in raising four spirited sons. I recall at about age three one of them (or maybe all of them) asked "Daddy, why am I running around in this little circle?" "Just settle down," I replied, "or I'll nail your other foot to the floor" Okay, before you call CPS on me, I think the statute of limitations has run out on that one. The "brats" today are all respectable, responsible and just plain fun human beings in their 50s and the whole thing only
happened in my demented little brain.

[McSkagit Tim Jones]

Kids Growing up today

Well I wrote my little ditty pretty much tongue-in-cheek. Only the mother aboard. The other male not the father. This boy needed to understand the word 'no' and 'please'. I pretty much let him do his thing, but when he reached for the throttles, I gave him a stern "NO", which he understood and didn't reach for the "Go" levers again.

A lot of kids out there today, don't have any outlet for "hands on" experience. All they have is TV and video games. For a boy with mechanical aptitude and nothing to work on or operate, would be a pretty frustrating world to live in.

I have four of my own. Starting taking my oldest out on jobs and tows at age five. I learned pretty fast (from mutiny) that boys need to eat on schedule, so I bought a small microwave and a motor-generator style inverter to power it. Picked up some of those quick microwaveable meals.

So on the next attempted mutiny, I'd toss one of those meals in the microwave, three minutes and stick a fork in and and hand it to him...EAT THIS! He did and ten minutes later back to normal. Mutiny averted.

I believe in introducing kids to the real world early on. My oldest at age 13, could operate the twin diesel tow boat himself including docking it, all electronics, radios, radar, navigation.....all of it. Got his masters license at 21. Today he is a Chief Petty Officer in the Coast Guard Reserves.

Start Them Early and Pay It Forward. Take a Kid For a Boat Ride. You just might change a life for the better.....

Oh, Jerry, I like your style!

Cheers,

Tim

[Seanfromseattle]

My son is four and already a serious boat nut. For the opening day of boating season here in Seattle, we took out 3 kids, 2, 3, & 4yrs old. And of course they all wanted to drive, but they had to have a grown up 'help them' stay 'on course'. Having more than one kid onboard helps A LOT! They can play with each other, rather than just drive the skipper crazy.

[Bflaherty]

Tim, as a recent father (9 months) of a little boy who is already showing signs that he is gonna be one of those kids who wants to drive.. I find your tale inspiring. I agree with TheBronze, that your situation sounds like poor parenting. My guess is that that boy has never Had an outlet to experience mechanical movement and the whole theory of cause and effect... I am already trying to show my boy the cause and effect of steering wheels, throttles and the like... I am firm believer in the "start them early" methods as my parents had my brother and I driving boats as soon as we could mostly see over the dash board.. I remeber my first "free ride" with no direct assistence from adult when just about like your story, hard to port - hard to starboard - then the almighty "full throttle" (in a 1940's Chris Craft with the pullout style throttle, as I pulled on it the force thru me back and thus I pulled more throttle...) it was truly an experience I will never forget, complete panic in everyone onboard, mosty my own...

I am glad to read that you are not completely turned off to the idea of taking kids out for boat rides. I think what you did for that boy will probably having a lasting effect on him even if he doesn't show it now...

[DMCI]

I wanted to try the boat the worst way since I was six. I think in men (who knows maybe even women as well) wanting to drive a boat is something that is built in. Even though it was a little less than 60 years ago, I can remember the first time I drove the boat in great detail. Ever since then I have wanted to drive the boat and have invested considerable resources in doing. Mind you, I don't have a 65 foot convertible yacht with monster turbo diesels, etc. but I don't think you need that kind of an asset to allow yourself to drive the boat.

I think Tim inadvertently has hit upon something that is a rite of passage for many individuals. Good for him and his philosophy, the boating industry depends on the generosity skippers everywhere.

The only thing one can do is wait until the individual in question has reached the point in his life where the kid has some personal judgment and is able to handle responsibility, before ever showing Him a boat. I am reminded that your basic softail Harley presents similar challenges.

[DMCI]

I wanted to drive the boat the worst way since I was six. I think in men (who knows maybe even women as well) wanting to drive a boat is something that is built in. Even though it was a little less than 60 years ago, I can remember the first time I drove the boat in great detail. Ever since then I have wanted to drive the boat and have invested considerable resources in doing just that. Mind you, I don't have a 65 foot convertible yacht with monster turbo diesels, etc. but I don't think you need that kind of an asset to allow yourself to drive the boat.

Tim inadvertently has hit upon something that is a rite of passage for many individuals. Good for him and his philosophy, the boating industry depends on the generosity of skippers everywhere.

The only thing one can do is wait until the individual in question has reached the point in his life where the kid has some personal judgment and is able to handle responsibility, before ever showing Him a boat.

[Stan D]

I learned to drive a boat in one of these. There used to be one at Woodland Park when they had amusement rides. That was a while ago.

[Bill Anderson]

that is funny!!! made me laugh